[It's been a hell of a day, almost literally. And she's pushing him. Her rage is as clear in her text as it had been clear in Dagger's, days before, and there's almost nothing he dares say to her. You will not involve any other recruit in any subversive or insubordinate behavior, nor will you involve yourself in them... You will follow these terms in letter and in spirit.]
I'm safe. They did not hurt me, I swear it. I thought you were scouting?
8ullshit! Don't you fucking lie to me! Gliese would never just not do anything! I know her kind! Tell me!
[ Her panic and her rage are total, but somewhat to her own surprise, she hasn't left yet. Her chest feels tight and cold with emotions she doesn't want to bother to name.
She just talked to me. Probably because I don't have a weapon with over 16 million attacks. [If only flits through his mind; he beats it down. No, no, no.] I'm not dead, after all. Clearly.
[ It's obvious he isn't physically hurt. She knows. She knows that isn't the only way to be hurt. The only way she herself has ever truly been hurt wasn't physically. ]
[And the thing is, he almost wants to tell her—someone, anyone. What he's seen and done and agreed to is eating him alive. But Vriska?
She's a walking breach of his contract. There's nothing he can say to her that's truthful, except Then I can't tell you anything. And that would take her off assignment faster than anything else.]
Please, Vriska. I'm all right. :-)
I asked them to explain my contract to me. That was what they did. _Please_ don't do anything.
I couldn't bear it if anything else happened to you because of me. [It is, in fact, true. But he's also trying to manipulate her. This may be very stupid.]
[ The smiley gets her more than anything. In the wake of Gliese's post, it's just fucking creepy, and his response as a whole gives her long and painful pause.
It hurts. Her face hurts, her chest hurts. She's never had to deal with this much emotion before because she's never had to keep it all in. ]
I will 8e fine. Unlike some people.
Why did you do this, Simon? Why start what you started?
[He takes a deep breath, staring at the message. He knows why he did it. But even before what happened with Gliese, he'd begun quietly adjusting his attitude. It makes it a lot easier, now, to answer.]
I was stupid. That's all. I caused nothing but trouble and I should have kept my mouth shut. [It sounds like he's been brainwashed. And perhaps that's not entirely untrue.]
When you're done with your scouting, come back and find me. I'll be here.
[ She may not know Simon very well. But that doesn't sound like the answer he would have given her before Gliese started pitching people into mountains. It doesn't satisfy her. ]
[And she'd frightened him to begin with, and then he'd come down on her side, and now she frightens him again, for reasons so much deeper than the little he can see. But he doesn't blame her. He knows who's to blame for all of this; he sees him in the mirror.]
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TO: serket.vriska@cdc.org
Vriska.
That's a lot of exclamation marks, my dear.
[He's been dreading this.]
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[It's been a hell of a day, almost literally. And she's pushing him. Her rage is as clear in her text as it had been clear in Dagger's, days before, and there's almost nothing he dares say to her. You will not involve any other recruit in any subversive or insubordinate behavior, nor will you involve yourself in them... You will follow these terms in letter and in spirit.]
I'm safe. They did not hurt me, I swear it. I thought you were scouting?
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[ Her panic and her rage are total, but somewhat to her own surprise, she hasn't left yet. Her chest feels tight and cold with emotions she doesn't want to bother to name.
Gliese. ]
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She just talked to me. Probably because I don't have a weapon with over 16 million attacks. [If only flits through his mind; he beats it down. No, no, no.] I'm not dead, after all. Clearly.
Please don't panic, Vriska.
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[ It's obvious he isn't physically hurt. She knows. She knows that isn't the only way to be hurt. The only way she herself has ever truly been hurt wasn't physically. ]
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She's a walking breach of his contract. There's nothing he can say to her that's truthful, except Then I can't tell you anything. And that would take her off assignment faster than anything else.]
Please, Vriska. I'm all right. :-)
I asked them to explain my contract to me. That was what they did. _Please_ don't do anything.
I couldn't bear it if anything else happened to you because of me. [It is, in fact, true. But he's also trying to manipulate her. This may be very stupid.]
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It hurts. Her face hurts, her chest hurts. She's never had to deal with this much emotion before because she's never had to keep it all in. ]
I will 8e fine. Unlike some people.
Why did you do this, Simon? Why start what you started?
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I was stupid. That's all. I caused nothing but trouble and I should have kept my mouth shut. [It sounds like he's been brainwashed. And perhaps that's not entirely untrue.]
When you're done with your scouting, come back and find me. I'll be here.
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Good. 8ecause we're going to need to talk.
8e careful, Simon.
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You too, Vriska. It's cold out there.